I have always enjoyed spending time with old people. As a child I would seek out and impose myself on the old men and women living in my neighbourhood, especially those living alone. I loved hearing their stories. I delighted in watching the old-fashioned approach to life (eg washing clothes in a steel tub with a two rollers to squeeze out the water). I relished looking at photos from a time I would never know. But best, that they seemed to enjoy the company of my 10 year old self, always warmly welcoming me and offering time enough to chat over a glass of cold cordial.
Therapists would try and explain my preference for these
significantly older companions by pointing out that I rarely saw my
grandparents as they lived in different cities and continents; or, that being
the eldest of four children I was seeking out some undivided attention; or
incorrectly, that I had difficulties relating to my own peers. Whatever. Some 35 years later, I recall the widower with his jar of
butterscotch and his invented contraption to capture mangoes from the higher
branches. I think back to
the canary yellow house and the lovely face of the 75 year old lady in stark
white face foundation and ruby red lipstick. I remember fondly, the old couple offering
their homemade rock-cakes - and
gems of wisdom like: “Up there for
thinking, down there for dancing”, while tapping a forehead with a
pointer-finger.
Older people continued to be a major focus in my life when I
graduated as a Social Worker. For
many years my clients have been older adults with dementia or mental health
issues like depression, unresolved grief, late onset schizophrenia. I have worked with these individuals in
their homes, hospitals, community health clinics and aged care facilities. Every person that I have met has
come with a different story colored by many years (a minimum of 65 years) of
experiences, adventures, difficulties, sadness, joy and challenges. And every story has had a unique impact
on their response to their illness.
This blog is about what I have learnt from these stories and
how they have impacted on the process of getting older, especially when faced
by the challenges of a dementia.
Geen opmerkingen:
Een reactie posten